Laugh Out Loud!

Laugh out loud often and your spirit will soar!

It's a well-known fact that laughter is the best medicine.

When was the last time you had a really good, long, belly laugh?

Did it bring you to tears?

How great did you feel afterward?

Light, happy, as though the weight of the world had been lifted from

your shoulders?

Guys, I can't stress enough how important laughter is to your happy

life. And while laughter is good, shared laughter is better!

There's just no greater feeling than you and someone close (or even

distant) sharing a moment or three of hilarity. Use the form below to

share your laugh out loud with us.

OLD FRIENDS

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades.

Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and

adventures.

Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a

week to play cards.

One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and

said, "Now don't get mad at me. I know we've been

friends for a long time but I just can't think of your name. I've

thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what

your name is."

Her friend glared at her.

For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her.

Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"

Help Humanity - Share Your LOL's

How would you like to do your bit for humanity?

The world needs more LOL's!

PLEASE send us some belly laughs to share.

You must have an old email somewhere that made you guffaw!

Remember that one ages ago that you kept in case you were ever in

need of a giggle?

Come on, share it with us, so we can all have a good guffaw.

We only ask that you keep them clean, as we are a family site!

Use the form below to send them in, and we'll publish the ones that

make us giggle.

It could be a joke, an anecdote or a video.

If you snort, we probably will too!

Humanity will thank you, (everyone loves to laugh out loud!) and

you'll have a happier place to live, surrounded by smiling, happy

people.

(Scroll down for more laughter).

Laugh Out Loud Legally!

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and

are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down

and now published by court reporters that had the torment of

staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

How did they restrain themselves?

When I read them I couldn't help but laugh out loud.

I particularly LOL'd at the last one!

What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?

WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'

ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?

WITNESS: My name is Susan!

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?

WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at

all?

WITNESS: Yes .

ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?

WITNESS: I forget.

ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something

you forgot?

___________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in

voodoo?

WITNESS: We both do.

ATTORNEY: Voodoo?

WITNESS: We do.

ATTORNEY: You do?

WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his

sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

____________________________________

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?

WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ.

____________________________ ______ _________

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?

WITNESS: Are you shitting me?

_________________________________________

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?

WITNESS: Getting laid

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: How many were boys?

WITNESS: None.

ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?

WITNESS: Your Honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get

a new attorney?

___________________________________ ______ ___

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?

WITNESS: By death.

ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

WITNESS: Take a guess.

____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?

WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.

ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?

WITNESS: Unless the circus was in town, I'm going with male.

_____ ________________________________

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a

deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed

on dead people?

WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. ________________________________________

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did

you go to?

WITNESS: Oral.

_________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?

WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?

______________________________________

And the best for last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check

for a pulse?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when

you began the autopsy?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive,

nevertheless?

WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and

practicing law.

This has kept my family amused for hours!!

Someone you know may need to laugh out loud right now!

Use the Socialize It! buttons below to share this page with someone

feeling glum. Do them a favour and make them laugh out loud!

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